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you didn't say you were sorry
2004-03-08 at 3:42 p.m. would have given up my life for you. guess it's true what they say about love...it's blind. boy, you lied straight to my face, looking in my eyes. and i believed you cause i loved you more than life. and all you had you had to do was apologize...you didn't say you're sorry. i don't understand. i don't care that you hurt me, and now i'm half the girl that i used to be when it was you and me. you didn't love me enough...my heart may never mend, and you'll never get to love me again. i've been thinking, and talking, a lot lately about how happy i'll be when that morning comes where this isn't the first thing on my mind. as much as i hate that forgetting is the only way of getting over things, i'm beginning to come to terms with it as my only solution. im waiting for the day that i don't go to bed angry about another promise broken or another dissapointment. i know days like that are in the future. it's just hard because i love that he's 6'3'', and that he has horribly long toes like me, and i love his clothes that are not stylish whatsoever, and i love that he's my opposite, and that the preppy girl got the hippy guy. and im pitiful really. i can't even bare digging into the archives here to see how long i've been writing about how i love his personality or how tall he is. maybe that offers you some insight into how much i want to wake up and have shed this part of my life. i leave for florida in 5 days, which is what's keeping me going right now. im horribly sick, i haven't gone to a full day of classes in who knows how long, and i am so bloody behind. but, i have palm trees and sunshine and alcohol to look forward to. no use in feeling for myself.
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