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where are you christmas?
2003-12-11 at 9:05 p.m. where are you christmas? why can't i find you? why have you gone away? my world is changing, im rearranging. does that mean christmas changes too? where are you christmas? do you remember the girl you used to know? you and i were so carefree...now nothings easy. did christmas change, or just me? --cindy lou who his so-called change is not going so well. i didn't expect anything less though, so no surprises here. i need a break from studying. funny thing is, i've spent the majority of my time today taking a break from studying, not actually studying. i took a nap, i talked on the phone, i went out to lunch, i went shopping, now i'm writing this. my study habits are just horrendous, but we knew this already. i am hopefully going to nyc this sunday with missy for four days. that should be a nice change in my life i figure. im sure it has to be beautiful there at christmas, which i am most excited for. i haven't bought anyone a single gift yet because 1.) i am very poor 2.) i have no car to get me from place to place 3.) it doesn't feel like christmas. is that weird that it doesn't feel like christmas? is it just me, or is everyone who is in their first year of college right now feeling that way? i suppose ive just been entirely overwhelmed by everything in the past few months that the idea that such a happy holiday still exists seems absurd. the lights and the shopping and the hot cider are drowned out by my car accident, the money i owe, the people im having problems with, and the studying i have to do. i don't know, it all seems so depressing.
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